The List

Here be inscribed the rules of the street skate, as have been passed down through ages untold, in no particular order:

1. Thou shalt always bring Jelly Babies
2. Thou shalt follow Lance, but take his directions with a pinch of salt and be prepared for sudden stops.
3. Thou shalt not follow Jim, as doing so will probably be detrimental to your health.
4. At all times thou shalt mind what people say, not what they do.
5. Thou shalt not talk about bearings during the skate. Or at all. Ever.
6. One only falls when one is doing something daft. Or highly dangerous. (Are they the same thing?)
7. Thou shalt keep thy hands and arms inside the vehicle at all times. (Or is that "away from the vehicle"?)
8. Shouldst thou think thine knees to be sufficiently bent, then thou art allways mistaken.
9. Thou shalt not take heed of advice from Pete, Jack or Neil.
10. Death or injury are strictly forbidden without permission... in writing.